If ever there was a song written for Intentional Dads, it is the 1974 number one hit “Cat’s in the Cradle” by Harry Chapin. I’ll save you the diatribe on how the seventies produced true “story songs” in contrast to some of the songwriting compositions today with mind-blowing lyrics like “I whip my hair back and forth”.
According to our good friend Wikipedia:
The song’s lyrics began as a poem written by Harry’s wife, Sandra; the poem itself was inspired by the awkward relationship between her first husband and his father. Chapin also said the song was about his own relationship with his son, Josh, admitting, “Frankly, this song scares me to death.”[5]
I don’t know the history of Chapin and his own son, but I hope he was scared enough to be intentional with the relatively few years that we have with our kids.
The older my boys got, the more anxious I was about the time spent with them because it seemed to be going by so fast. My wife and I still get teary-eyed watching videos of our boys when they were pre-school age because it feels like we blinked and they were grown men. All the more reason to make those moments count.
If you’ve never heard the song or have forgotten, let these words resonate deep inside of you.
My child arrived just the other day
He came to the world in the usual way
But there were planes to catch, and bills to pay
He learned to walk while I was away
And he was talking ‘fore I knew it, and as he grew
He’d say, I’m gonna be like you, dad
You know I’m gonna be like youAnd the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
When you coming home, dad?
I don’t know when, but we’ll get together then
You know we’ll have a good time thenMy son turned ten just the other day
He said, thanks for the ball, dad, come on let’s play
Can you teach me to throw, I said, not today
I got a lot to do, he said, that’s okay
And he walked away, but his smile never dimmed
Said, I’m gonna be like him, yeah
You know I’m gonna be like himAnd the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
When you coming home, dad?
I don’t know when, but we’ll get together then
You know we’ll have a good time thenWell, he came from college just the other day
So much like a man I just had to say
Son, I’m proud of you
Can you sit for a while?
He shook his head, and he said with a smile
What I’d really like, dad, is to borrow the car keys
See you later, can I have them please?And the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
When you coming home, son?
I don’t know when, but we’ll get together then
You know we’ll have a good time thenI’ve long since retired and my son’s moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said, I’d like to see you if you don’t mind
He said, I’d love to, dad, if I could find the time
You see, my new job’s a hassle, and the kid’s got the flu
But it’s sure nice talking to you, dad
It’s been sure nice talking to you
And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me
He’d grown up just like me
My boy was just like meAnd the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
When you coming home, son?
I don’t know when, but we’ll get together then
You know we’ll have a good time then
Dad, I pray that, like Harry Chapin, this song “scares you to death” and that you make the most of every moment you have with your kids…even when you’re exhausted after a long day at work…even when you hear others talk about getting some “me time”…even when you just don’t want to “go outside and play.” One day, you’ll have plenty of time for all of those things clamoring for your attention that have nothing to do with raising healthy children.
You can do this dad. I believe in you.
